Alana Reina

Finding Light in a Dark Place

Finding Light in a Dark Place

I had no intention of writing or posting about this topic, but seeing the outpour of encouraging words on social media following the very tragic and public suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain (who is a huge idol of mine), it prompted me to speak up about my own depression. I have battled with it on and off my whole life, have at times been medicated for it (seven horrible years on Zoloft to be exact), have seen many therapists, and have come to accept that it is something that I and many people just have to face at different phases of our lives. The last week or two have been especially rough for me, and I am taking this moment of awareness as an opportunity to share my story in the hopes that it helps someone else. The reason I feel that it’s important to speak up about…

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Learning to Bloom Even When the Flowers Aren’t

Learning to Bloom Even When the Flowers Aren’t

When I moved to the West Coast, I had to internalize the rhythm and the feeling of the seasons. Since the weather is nice almost year round, there is barely any indication that the seasons have shifted at all. Now that I am back on the East Coast, where the weather will LET you know what season we are in, it is definitely easier to keep track. However, this week’s blizzard (on the second official day of Spring) is proof that the correlation between weather and season is not always accurate.What I have found to be a more important indicator than weather, though, is the ebb and flow of energy that take place, which naturally coincide with the seasons. Like the phases of the moon, there are four distinct seasons. In the Winter, we are naturally more introspective, storing energy and “hibernating”; it is a time of initiation, setting intentions,…

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Racially Ambiguous: A Memoir

Racially Ambiguous: A Memoir

“What are you?” The question seems innocuous enough, but hear it enough times and it starts to creep under your skin. What AM I? The older I get, the less sure I feel about my identity, and the more desperate I feel to know my identity so I can own it and assert it with pride. I know I am not the only one – the rise of mail-in gene testing services proves that there is demand for identity clarification! Growing up, it was simple enough. For most people, identity development doesn’t begin until early adolescence, and despite feeling like an outsider in most social situations for most of my life, the question of my identity didn’t begin until I moved away to college at the age of 18. For the first time, I was living away from the net of built-in identity markers that I took for granted while…

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The Millennial Struggle

The Millennial Struggle

We’ve all heard of it. Most of us are living it. Shit, it has become such a cliché that the mere mention of those words can induce eye rolls that rival a seizure. But for those whom it applies to, it is very real and does not seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. In fact, with our current administration and state of affairs, domestically and worldwide, it seems like it is going to get A LOT worse before it gets better. Everything from crippling student loans to the endless search for the perfect avocado toast are part of the millennial struggle. Using memes to work through our political and existential angst (also known as sublimation, thank you psych degree), obsessing over booty gains, fawning over anything and everything millennial pink (guilty AF), and making EVERY. DAMN. THING. into a hashtag—these are all quintessential elements of being a millennial. But…

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